Homeschool Questions: Homeschool One Child and Public School for My Other Two

by Shannon
(Shippensburg, Pa, USA)

Homeschool Questions

Homeschool Questions

Struggling mom has some homeschool questions and is looking for advice. Please share your experience, thoughts or some encouragement...

I really am struggling with the decision to homeschool my youngest daughter, who is in 2nd grade. She doesn't necessarily dislike school or her teacher, but some days she is simply exhausted and whiny. She has been having "accidents" since school started, two weeks ago. She misses me.

I really don't know if any of these reasons are good ones to just start homeschooling. I am not a big fan of public education to begin with, so that doesn't help. On the other hand, my 9 year old is extremely social, loves being at school and with her friends and seems to really thrive in that environment.

My son just started middle school and has his friends too, but there is no recess and I feel it is a long day to sit for almost 7 hours, with the exception of switching from room to room for classes and having gym weekly.

My question is: What do you think of homeschooling only one child if the other two really want to stay at school? The problem is that once they have already been in "the public school system" for years, it seems hard to remove them. I'm afraid of them not doing well socially, if I withdraw them from school. Any advice or opinions are greatly appreciated.

Undecided Struggling Mom

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Sep 13, 2010
Been there, sort of
by: Anonymous

As mom, you know what's ultimately best for your child, and if that means homeschool one but not another, do it. As far as pulling out after having been in school, let me share my story. Kids were in private school until 5th & 6th when we lost our business. Daughter (5th) hated school, son (6th) was very social. He did miss his friends, but he understood we had no choice. They both began going to youth group since they were no longer too tired and overloaded with school work. We found a co-op where they made even better friends. Community sports were available as well as homeschool sports leagues.

It was a change and we all had to adapt, but both kids now say they are much happier homeschooling than they ever were in school - academically and socially.

I hope you find the right balance for your family. What's best for one isn't always what's best for the other. Or, what one wants may not be what's ultimately in his/her best interest. Pray for wisdom.


Feb 15, 2011
I understand completely!
by: Anonymous

I actually am homeschooling one child my youngest. He really had a hard time with public school and begged to homeschool. He is autistic and just had a hard time all around. My olderst loves public school and does great. She is super social and wants to be around her friends and just does very well. So I am homeschooling my youngest and public schooling my oldest. It works out great for us and everyone is happy. Most of all my son. He is able to relax now and enjoys doing his school work and just being home with me. We have days where we go to the park and learn or to the hands on science center, zoos and museums. He get;s to study the things he loves and it has really opened up an entirely new world for him. So I say if your child wants to homeschool and your others do great in public school then do what is best for your family.

Aug 20, 2011
Same dilemma!
by: Anonymous

I have 3 children - oldest in 6th grade very happy in public school, then twins in 3rd grade. One wants desperately to homeschool the other wants to stay in school she is very happy.
My gut is to hs the twin that wants it so badly let the other two go to regular school giving me a year to get used to it all then see if the other twin wants to HS later.
I am just concerned about them having issues later with "fairness" and such. The one who wants to homeschool has a group of
tennis homeschool friends so has dreams and goals and social group that all are doing the same thing....
Ideally I'd love to HS all of them -- getting lots of resistance from out of state grandparents (wish I'd never mentioned it to them)
Thinking the worst case is it doesn't work out and she goes back to regular school... am I missing anything?

Aug 31, 2011
one child homeschooled and one in public school
by: Anonymous

I have one 5 yr old in public school (kindergarden) that was homeschooled last year and has covered everything pretty much that they are doing now. We kept his older brother home because he is having difficulty with reading out oud and concentrating. I wish ten times over I would have kept both boys out and homeschooled them. My youngest came home after first week pf school and said he wanted me to be his teacher, because he needed to learn more than what they were teaching him. Talking about breaking my heart.We are praying about what God wants us to do. It all just depends on what GOd lays on your heart. It's our jobs as their mother to be sure that our kids know everything they can and can learn to each one to their capacity. God bless,
Christina Allen

Sep 01, 2011
Re: Same Dilemma
by: Heather

I think you are doing the right thing... who knows? The twin that goes to public school may see her homeschooling sibling having and enjoying way more fun and freedom (flexibility) and want to be homeschooled too!

As far as fairness issues coming up... maybe periodically sit down ps twin to talk about school and how it's going AND their decision to choose public school. If you remind them from time to time that you would love to homeschool them if they ever wanted, I think it would eliminate any future issues of fairness, etc. Sometimes it helps to write things down.

When we first started homeschooling, I wrote down the reasons why we choose home education for our oldest. As we talked, I wrote down both the benefits and the drawbacks! Then I had my daughter do the same exercise and the only negative on her list was missing her friends and recess (her favorite subject in school). We still have this piece of paper and would take it out from time to time, to reminder her why we chose homeschooling for her/our family.

As far as resistance from out-of-state grandparents, etc. Kindly thank them for their concern, but do what you know is right for your children.

Hope this helps! :)

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